The Work of Byron Katie



I'm Not Living Up to My Full Potential (Part 1)

A man who is convinced that he can't make a living doing what he really wants to do questions his crippling beliefs through The Work with Byron Katie.

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[Text on screen]: The Work of Byron Katie on: "I'm not living up to my full potential." Part 1

Byron Katie: So what did you write?

Man: Okay.

Man: I wrote that: I'm frustrated at me because I don't know how to make a living that is true to who I am.

Everything I want to do is selfish and doesn't pay the rent. I want me to find clarity. . .

Byron Katie: So, "you need to pay the rent." Is it true?

Man: No.

Byron Katie: You say "no" like it's the right answer. Consider that.

Man: Well; no.

Byron Katie: Are you all considering that? Whether the word is mortgage or rent. Does anyone in world "need to pay their rent?"

All you landlords, are you sweating?

"You need to pay the rent." Is it true?

Imagine what it would be like without that thought when your rent's due, when they're coming to evict you.

How do you react when you think that thought and you, you don't have the money for it? That's the point.

You don't have the money for it or you have the money for it and you're just too terrified to let it go because you're going to need it for the future.

How many of you have been in that position?

You know, from there, how do you react when you think the thought?

Man: If I can't pay the rent I feel like I can't take care of myself. Like I'm a failure.

Byron Katie: And then what emotions happen in that?

Man: I feel embarrassed. Then I feel just like a second-class citizen.

Byron Katie: And do you see images of yourself in the future having to ask someone you care about for help?

Man: I don't have to go to the future to see that. Yeah, I have asked.

Byron Katie: And do you see stories of, I mean, images of you having to do it again?

Man: And I don't like it. I push it away.

Byron Katie: Yeah and that's the embarrassment you feel because you're witnessing those images.

Those images are what, I mean like, like it has babies. Those are the babies that hold up the original concept.

"I have to pay the rent." So, it's not right or wrong. It's all about noticing where your suffering comes from.

Man: It threatens my sense of independence that I can take care of myself.

Byron Katie: Honey, would you write down "I can't take care of myself." So, let's turn it around. "I have to pay the rent."

Man: "I don't have to pay the rent."

Byron Katie: So, give me an example of why that's true; when you don't have money for it.

Man: I could work at McDonald's if I needed to. That's É

Byron Katie: "I'm willing to?"

Man: "I'm willing to."

Byron Katie: " I look forward to."

Man: "I look forward to. . ."

Byron Katie: "I look forward to working at McDonald's."

Man: "I look forward to paying; working at McDonald's." Yeah.

Byron Katie: Yeah. You know, it could be a lot. . .

Man: It's kind of true.

Byron Katie: Yeah. I love you're catching on to that. My goodness sake. Wherever you can serve.

Man: Sometimes I say my dream job is just to work at Home Depot and get paid and to have some free time.

Yeah. I'm not joking. Yeah.

Byron Katie: I get it. I'm not joking either.

Man: Yeah. I can see that.

Byron Katie: So, let's have that conservation. You be your family and all those people you want to impress

and I'm going to be you working at Home Depot. Okay.

Byron Katie: Okay, so, ask me where I work.

Man: "So, where do you work now?"

Byron Katie: "Home Depot."

Man: "Oh. You're not really living up to your potential."

Byron Katie: "You know, you could be right."

Man: "I think you should come, come home and live here and we'll find a way for you to get a real job."

Byron Katie: "You know, that's lovely and you know, I really like my job here."

"And thank you for that; you're so incredibly generous."

"You've always been there in that way for me. I'm so grateful."

"You want to hear about my job?"

Man: "Yeah."

Byron Katie: "I love my job and I love the hours and the people there and I'm really good at following directions, so I never have to think."

"You know, it's like heaven and they pay me. I get to run all those tools and serve people and it's like a workout. Lifting all those things."

"I stay healthy. I mean, in and out, so it's not like having to sit all day. It's great!"

Man: "You're sure you're not; you shouldn't be doing something more important?"

Byron Katie: "Well, you know, it's very important to me that I like what I do and that I have plenty of spare time to; to live a balanced life."

Man: That could be me saying that. That sounds like me.

Byron Katie: Isn't it. So, you have a job you don't like. Hours you don't like. An apartment maybe that you can't afford; I don't know.

All because you don't want someone to say, "You're not living up to your full potential."

Man: Sounds pretty silly, doesn't it?

Byron Katie: Once we break it down, yes.

Man: Yeah.

Byron Katie: Terrifying.

Man: Yeah, I'm terrified of what others think of me, especially my family.

Byron Katie: And not living up to your full potential.

Man: Yeah. I'm terrified of that.

Byron Katie: Yeah. So, how would you even know what it is? Whatever job you take on, are you sure that's your full potential?

Man: That's why I'm stuck; because I don't know.

It's like I have to be sure it's going to be something that's going to live up to my full potential before I'll even start it.

Byron Katie: So, whatever you take on, do it as well as you can and that's your full potential.

That's how I do the dishes. That's how I scrub the floor. It's how I; it's how I am with my children, my husband. I do the best that I can.

Byron Katie: And that's my full potential in the moment and it's good with me.

It's not maybe so hot for others; but it is good for me and so, full potential is doing whatever you do in the moment, isn't it? It's not later?

So, you know, they could miss that you are living up to your full potential, but it's important that you don't miss it.

Man: I see that and I'm afraid to act on that, because É

Byron Katie: Because they might say you're not living up to your full potential.

Man: Yeah. Yeah.

Byron Katie: Okay. So, when I say "three," everyone say to him out loud, "You're not living up to your full potential"

so he can get this out of his system. I want to see if you die or not.

Audience and Byron Katie: "You're not living up to your full potential."
Man: That was É

Byron Katie: How you doing?

Man: I'm still sitting here.

Byron Katie: It's shocking isn't it?

Man: Yeah.

Byron Katie: Now, as you sit there, are you, are you; is your body comfortable enough? Is it okay with you?

Man: Not too bad.

Byron Katie: Okay. So, this is your full potential.

Man: Yeah.

Byron Katie: You're doing it in every moment.

Man: This is it.

Byron Katie: Yeah. Sit with friends.

Man: Takes some of the pressure off.

Byron Katie: Well, reality has a way about it, as opposed to imagination.

Man: Yeah.

Byron Katie: Imagination, not keeping up with reality, is not that comfortable.

You know, if you had the biggest job in the world and the whole world was saying, "You're so wonderful at this."

To your own mind you could still believe that you're not living up to your full potential and you don't like that job.

Man: Yeah.

Byron Katie: In other words, you're going to take that belief with you no matter where the job is. No matter what the job is.

Because it's what you're believing you take with you. It has nothing to do with the outside thing: a job.

And if I am doing the dishes and I have the thought, "I'm not living up to my full potential,"

I may notice that there's a dish I didn't rinse as well as I could have and I may rinse it again, or not and it may occur to me

I don't care that much about my full potential; that I'm doing the best that I can and I accept it.

Or I may find that I pick up the dish, rinse it again and it's just as comfortable.

So, continue to read.

Man: "Everything I want to do is selfish and doesn't, and doesn't pay the rent."

Byron Katie: What do you mean by, "Everything you want to do is selfish?"

Man: I really want to question everything and find the truth.

Byron Katie: So, you need to take some time out.

Man: That's what I want.

Byron Katie: Yeah.

Man: And that, in my mind, doesn't look good from everyone else's point of view.

Byron Katie: And yours?

Man: If I don't look at everyone else, it looks; it sounds like heaven.

Byron Katie: And whose life is it?

Man: Mine.
Byron Katie: And how you doing; living your life out of what other people want you to live? How's that working for you?

Man: Miserable.

Byron Katie: Why don't you just ask the one that matters, yourself, and try that people.

[Text on screen]: THE WORK of Byron Katie

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Please select part 2, The Work of Byron Katie on "I'm not living up to my full potential."


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